And then some...

Okay, I have no idea why I chose that title to my post. It was the first phrase that came into my mind so I'll go with it... I guess that's how it has felt today. Just when it seems like things are going really crappy, and I'm stressed out, angry, and my work load is too big for the day something ELSE happens to add to it all. But that something else isn't necessarily bad. It's kind of miraculous, really. It feels like something you can't quite describe with words, yet you know its there and that its important. It is a subtle shifting of energy away from the things of the world - the objects, people, thoughts, emotions, tasks, demands, and noise - and into otherness. I caught glimpses of it throughout the day: a baby bird just out of the nest trying to hide from me behind the edge of a windowpane of a storefront. He was too weak yet to fly, but smart enough to know that he needed to protect himself. Yet he didn't seem afraid. He knew I wouldn't hurt him. Then I saw it again in the smile of the cashier at Pita Inn where we had dinner. He was so joyful at his register with his accent and silly little hat on! I wanted to talk to him about how AMAZING the mint iced tea is there! Instead I just smiled back. I saw it in the eyes of a client. I saw trust. I saw beauty and goodness. I saw my reflection in those eyes - just for a moment. And finally I felt it towards the end of giving Dave a massage when I do my favorite myofascial work on the head and neck. I got lost in it, with my eyes closed, and I was startled at the sound of Dave snoring when I thought that he was consciously moving his head around and around, slowly, yet too quickly I thought, and from side to side. He was asleep! Something else was moving him! Its the otherness that I believe keeps me going. It is God, I suppose. The Tao, the Universe, the space in between. When you don't see it or aren't open to it you forget that its there. When you ask to be shown it seems to always reveal itself. Though not right away, and always when you least expect it. And then you feel whole - just long enough to know what it is that you're after and that its always been there. And then we forget again.